The Capacity Generator
When doing whatever we're meant to do in the world, let alone trying to manage our own lives, feels so frigging hard some days...
Hi there,
There are times in life, it seems to me for just about all of us, when we just. don’t. have. the bloody energy or the ‘je ne sais quoi’ to do a damn thing.
I’m not talking about a bad day or a tough week… I mean times that last months or more.
Feeling low, listless. Burned out. Total stuck. Try as we might, as hard as we can… we’re not going anywhere and it feels like everything. Just everything. Takes sooooooo much…. Effort.
Geesh. :(
Times when we are:
- SO conscious of the things we want to experience and DO with our lives and work.
- Poignantly aware of the folks around us who seem to be so bloody together and rocking their life – bless them, but god… it’s heartbreaking too. ‘How do they DO THAT?!’…
The best we seem to be able to do is get out of bed. Maybe.
Life can at these times feel very, very heavy, full-of-effort, and often enough… very much… ALONE.
We don’t know how someone could help us even when they want to. We don’t know what the problem IS!
We are paralyzed by several good ideas and – we can’t seem to do em.
Our ‘situation’ may be impinging on others, loved ones, causing the weight of being a burden.
The soul-sinking feeling that we are failing, for the time being at least, this game of life, and have no energy to do the things we reckon we need to do to change.
Old friends or a even a resource book will tell us – or we just assume they think it – ‘get off your effing ass and fix this’ The thing is… that requires fire energy.
But the fire, for now, is out. Or gol-darn dim.
Something’s amiss, so we take stock:
- WTF is going on with me anyway?
- I'm smart, but I am struggling.
- I am 'good people'.
- I'm a leader in my own way and strong *somewhere* deep inside.
- I do remember what my fire felt like, and no matter what the world or the consequences of my own endeavours have thrown me – there IS flame inside me.
But where the beegeezus is it?
No damn idea.
So… We survive. We get up every day, somehow ;) and we still try. We gamely try. We’re indomitable that way, we never give up.
We feel - and this is the most important thing on this whole page - we feel... deep down, that we WILL crack this somehow. We know it. Somehow...
We don’t give up trying to find ‘some wedge of light’ somewhere – a book, an idea, a ‘sudden change inside’ that will release us from the prison.
But holy geez. If you're anything like I was... months go by, perhaps years… and still… staring at the computer screen… thinking…
“What. the. ---- is the MATTER? I can’t seem to DO anything.”
A few years ago I was in a spot like this. The worst of it lasted a year. It’s not the same for everybody, times like this, but for me I lost the ability to communicate much at all – with anyone outside my home.
I messed up a lot of obligations and responsibilities with good people as it tumbled downwards. Hated the phone, and email even more because they overwhelmed me. Lost my income as business dried up.
And felt like a failure to my family. I found it hard to even say ‘sorry’ properly to people I affected because apologies often require one to say 'here's what I'll do to fix it if you'll let me'. But... I was out of commission. Burnt out. I had no idea if I could live up to any promise I so so SO wanted to make.
A chance you relate to this?
And I can remember, as if it were yesterday, the morning it turned around.
Something happened. A very, very small thing. Just a thought, in fact.
I’ve got an impressive healing toolbox of meditation, energy healing, and great supporters in my life… but nothing made an iota of difference to my situation – until. This thing happened.
I was staring at the computer doing the usual fight with myself to DO SOMETHING or find some solution to how I felt – just like months of days before it. As I stared at the screen that morning, wishing I could re-begin my Big Dream Program work that I love so much. Wishing I could talk to YOU, like I’m doing now. I found myself thinking…
I just don’t have the capacity to do ANYTHING!
And then it happened...
The thing that changed everything.
It was – a little thought. It appeared out of the gloom like a bird who fluttered into my mind. Completely unexpected. The thought said:
‘I do have enough capacity to brush my teeth.’
The thought, small as it was, stopped me cold. I had indeed brushed my teeth an hour earlier.
Then, minutes later, another thought fluttered in as I sipped my tea…
‘I do have enough capacity to make a tea’.
I started writing these ideas down.
Then a third thought:
‘Although I don’t have the capacity to email anyone, I do have the capacity to stand up and stretch’.
That moment, that morning, depression turned around for me.
And I started making a list.
By the end of the day I’d made a list of 100 things, and I could feel deep down that ‘something was shifting’.
I discovered there were some learning curves and a few wrong-turns along the way with this journaling exercise, but suffice to say a few months later depression was completely gone. Just. Gone. Ain’t been back. I was getting my life back.
This became for me a list-making, journal-based, HIGH return-on-energy exercise I came to call the Capacity Generator. And when I got back to work – due to this generator – I started sharing it with friends and clients. Here are a couple of them...
"The Capacity Generator is a very different self-help approach. Rather than trying to convince ourselves that the depressed states we feel aren’t real, this acknowledges and validates exactly where we are. By observing simple things, we notice what we’re taking for granted, begin to realize our strengths, and make small changes that can add up to big gains over time. Alex’s warmth, encouragement, and genuine relatability come through in his videos and his writing. In fact, on Day 2 of the experience, I wrote in my CapGen journal that “I have more than enough capacity to recognize a great teacher. <3"
Adrienne in Arizona
"I highly recommend this 10-day journey. I found myself surprised by the potency of these exercises & their ability to transform the tangled knots inside of my heart and head. The places where emotions build into seemingly unsurmountable obstacles on the way to my goals. The simple act of writing each day about things I was able to do, gently and magically turned my attention towards those things, and caused me to start looking for them in anticipation. I found that well of efficacy inside of me begin to build. And as a facilitator, Alex holds space with such gentleness and love, walking right along with you each step of the way."
Julie in Toronto
"The experience you have provided has really, and I mean REALLY, helped me. My brain is buzzing. I can't remember a time when I have felt so excited and proactive. I am so much more positive. I love getting up and dressed, doing my chores, playing with my kitties, packing up, and getting on the road to my study place. Already, I have stepped so much closer to my goal of activating my business. I applied for (AND GOT!) a scholarship for training that fits exactly into my niche. For the first time ever, I have found a system of journalling to move away from my depression and anxiety that works for me. I hate journalling! But the bites you encourage me to take are so small and yet so significant. Thank you, thank you, thank you! "
Hollie in Ontario
What I learned from these original trailblazers was: If one plugs specific things into the CapGen journaling exercise, in a sequence we all learned was most effective...
out the other end would come more strength, confidence, peace, lightness - just from writing... and noticing specific things.
1%. Then 2%. Then 10%… Precious. Precious. Progress. At a time when one feels it the most. Measureable. Noticeable. Just like I had as depression started to dissolve.
We’re coming BACK. And most intriguingly, with more than when we ‘left’. Bam. We KNEW it!
Plus, we learned the same list-making, journaling approach can be used to nourish and grow any quality we are most ‘wanting for’ – even if it’s not about depression or burnout – a client used it for building more LOVE in her life.
Get the 11-Module Video eKit here...
The Capacity Generator is now, after much work, available as an eKit, which you can begin right now – in a minute or two, if you’d like.
Here’s what you'll get in your eKit:
- 11 video modules: A Welcome + Getting Started video, then 10 Capacity Generator video lessons.
- 4 ‘prime the generator’ questions that TOTALLY help you see and measure your progress.
- In each lesson I will give you an exercise to write 25 lines throughout the day – very specific 2-column lines that I’ll teach you how to do – in your journal or on your computer.
- I give you 5 sample CapGen lines for your journaling exercise after each video to help you.
- It should take you 20-30mins per lesson to complete this.
This course is quick and packs a punch. I expect you will feel the glimmerings of results within the first couple of lessons. And that’s due to the hundreds and hundreds of hours – and close to 100,000 journal lines – that I and the early trailblazers completed to figure out what works the best. We were happy to do it, because it changed our lives. And on behalf of all of them, I am so pleased to be able to make this simple and (I hope you find awesome) eKit available for you.
How to get your eKit:
I do this work with private clients, as I mentioned, and before I had the eKit available it was $775 to do this and other 'what's my thing and how can I make it happen' work in private sessions. And I continue to do this, and love it.
But… if that’s not an option for you, this eKit makes this work more accessible for folks who’d prefer to do it on your own.
I’m VERY happy with the results of this kit and being able to offer it. Especially if you keep in touch and let me know how it helps. I care a LOT about how this lands. Please let me know. If you have questions, there is an email contact link for me personally on the checkout page.
The price for the eKit is $75 (Canadian)… Click here for a currency converter.
If this all resonates, and if you can do it, then I'll see you on the inside :)
Big hug,
Alex Baisley